I know what it means to rebuild a life from zero.
I know the feeling of fleeing violence with your children, of walking into an empty space, and deciding that no matter what it takes, you will keep a safe, stable roof over their heads.
My values weren’t learned from a book nor were they learned throughout my childhood; they were forged through survival, through protecting my kids, and through pursuing an education to build a better future for myself – and to be a role model for my kids.
But when you live in a system that measures your home against bureaucratic quotas and market rents, you realise quickly that single-parent families are constantly expected to absorb administrative flaws alone.
Every day across Victoria, too many single-mother families stand at the exact same kitchen table that I do. We share the same goals: keeping our children safe, raising them with dignity, and giving them every opportunity to thrive (whilst hiding our stress and emotions).
Yet we face a system that treats our single income as something to be squeezed.
After rent, utilities, registration, insurance, transport, and healthcare costs are paid, there isn’t enough left for nutritious food that meets my dietary needs, let alone for extras when my children come to visit. I also cannot afford medical equipment recommended by specialists because many essential items are not covered by PBS or NDSS.
Then there was my recent experience with my rental provider. When my electricity bills soared, it wasn’t because I was wasting energy. It was because my rental home’s structural defects made it harder and more expensive to keep the house comfortable and safe. Compensation intended to help with those costs never reached my pocket. Instead, it was absorbed into my tenancy account after my rent increased from an affordable, income-based rate to a market-based one, leaving me to carry the financial burden.
We see policies that penalise our adult kids for trying to get a job or study, rules punish families for trying to move forward financially and living costs that leave us constantly wondering what expense we will have to sacrifice next.
When housing policies threatened to separate my family, I had to make difficult choices. My daughter moved out to build a rental history after being refused a place on my lease. She was asked personal questions about her relationship and living arrangements that felt like an invasion of privacy. Rather than accept these decisions, I spoke up, challenged them, and took our concerns to regulators and parliamentary inquiries. These policies don’t just affect tenants. They can have a lasting impact on children and young people, regardless of their age.
We are at a turning point right now. If we stay silent, policies will continue to be designed around the assumption of two incomes while single mothers are left to choose between housing, health and basic survival.
But when we speak as one voice, we prove that our families are not passive recipients of broken policy; we are the experts on our own lives.
Like every parent, I want my children to grow up feeling valued, secure and hopeful about their future, free from the financial and emotional pressures that too often define life for single parent families.
Every child deserves that security, regardless of whether they are raised in a one-parent or two-parent household.
This shouldn’t be an aspiration. It should be a guarantee.
*name changed to protect privacy
Louise’s* experience is one of many stories highlighting the challenges facing single mother families. This Victorian election, we’re calling on political leaders to take action. Add your name to our Open Letter and help ensure single mothers are seen, heard and prioritised this election.
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