Everyone loves a holiday.
I have two boys, and since my separation from their dad, we have not been able to travel as often as we used to. Last year, we only managed a few days in Ballarat. Every couple of months, my younger son asks me, “Mum, when can we go on a holiday? Christian, Sabina and Matthew all went away this term!”
My answer always begins with a sigh and a frown. There are so many reasons why it is difficult for me to make a family holiday happen. Cost of living is one of the biggest barriers. As everyday expenses keep rising—mortgage payments, groceries, petrol, school costs, utilities and insurance (I was forced to drop the pet insurance for the family cat)—there is less and less left over at the end of each pay cycle. A holiday is no longer just a matter of choosing a destination; it becomes a careful calculation of what we may have to give up, delay or go without.
When less money is left over, I feel more pressure to work longer hours or take on extra work just to keep up. But those extra hours come at a cost too. They take away the time and energy I need to research affordable places, compare transport options, check school-holiday prices, plan meals, pack properly, and make sure the trip is safe and manageable for two children. Even the planning stage can feel out of reach when I am already exhausted from trying to meet the basic demands of work and parenting.
This means cost-of-living pressure affects us twice: it reduces the budget for the holiday, and it also reduces the time and capacity to make the holiday happen. For many families, a trip away may simply be a fun break. For my children, it is also a chance to see different places, meet different people, learn resilience, build confidence and understand that the world is bigger than our everyday routine.
Another unspoken barrier is that I simply cannot manage the household, keep up with work, and plan a holiday at the same time. Holiday logistics with two young children can feel like another full-time job squeezed into an already crowded day. Life is hard enough, and unfortunately my children are missing out on those beautiful family memories.
For single mothers like me, we are often so busy raising our children and keeping our jobs that anything beyond the basics can feel like a luxury—financially, practically and emotionally. We do not really have the choice to do more than keep everyday life running. Unlike some older people or people living with disability, who may be able to access subsidised home services through aged care or the NDIS, single-parent families often do not have similar practical support. We may receive Family Tax Benefit, but it does not stretch far enough to cover full-priced home services.
As a result, we are often forced to sacrifice opportunities for our children to see and experience different landscapes, cultures and ways of life. Without those experiences, it can be harder for them to develop a truly open mind and a meaningful understanding of diversity.
Our single mother community is calling for more support to be made available to single parent families, who can be just as stretched and disadvantaged as other groups already recognised as needing support. With the right practical help, we can free up time, energy and resources to give our children broader experiences.
My hope is simple: that my boys grow up with curiosity, confidence, compassion and an open mind; that they are not limited by my circumstances; and that they have the chance to see the wider world and imagine a bigger future for themselves.
This is not only my hope. It is a hope shared by so many single mothers—that despite the pressure we carry, our children will still have every opportunity to learn, explore, belong and thrive.
*name changed to protect privacy
Yun Shu’s experience is one of many stories highlighting the challenges facing single mother families. This Victorian election, we’re calling on political leaders to take action. Add your name to our Open Letter and help ensure single mothers are seen, heard and prioritised this election.
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